Becoming An Expression of Wonder by Marijane Thompson, Guest Blogger
Day 55 of 100 days of Blogging
Guest Blogger Friday!
BECOMING AN EXPRESSION OF WONDER
By Marijane Thompson
“The Universe is full of magical things, patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper.”
~ Eden Phillpotts
~ Eden Phillpotts
Does the ability to experience Wonder dim with age? It does not need to.
I spent the past week in Rhinebeck, NY with my 93 yr old mom, who still lives alone in a federally subsidized senior apartment. My dad passed away five months after they moved there in 1992… he was 85 and thirteen years her senior. She now has an aide to help out 2 hrs/day, 5 days/week, since her strength and mobility are steadily decreasing. It is only a matter of time when she will press her Lifeline in the middle of the night for one reason or another, go to the hospital, and never return to her independent space. There have been several trips so far this year, but all for something minor and she has returned within several hours. Although her mind is relatively clear, day-to-day living is becoming harder and overwhelm can set in quite easily.
We have been discussing her funeral plans for a while, and last week the trust was finally set up so things will go according to her wishes after she departs. There are numerous applications (skilled nursing facilities, Medicaid) to be filled out, nurses’ assessments to be conducted, and on every visit we go through drawers and the closet to continue to lighten her life.
Each night I am there, as I lay on the old narrow sleeper sofa, my brain attempts to relax and to temporarily release thoughts of all the tasks that need attention. I wonder what her life has been about…. what legacy does she feel she is leaving behind? I know that her family – mother, sisters, husband, children and grandchildren have been the joys of her life – people in general have been what is important. She has been kind, supportive and compassionate, and loves to show people that she cares. Last week when she was in the ER for a blood pressure issue, she asked the name of everyone who showed up to help her – and remembered them. “Oh, your name is Agnes? I went to school with Agnes Doyle; you don’t hear that name much today!” And when I wheeled her out, she was elated to see Agnes to say goodbye, and it was obvious that small gesture made Agnes’ day. Everyone enjoys her and remarks how she does not seem to portray her age.
She tells me that she tries not to think about dying. Some days she wishes she would pass in her sleep…. she is so weary, and still misses my dad. Yet in the next moment, she will tell me how wonderful it felt to have her aide wash her hair, and that she is so glad her new blood pressure meds have taken away the full feeling in her head. It is all Wonder… feeling good with the simple things.
And that is how I want to live the rest of my life… seeing the obvious Wonder that is always there if I just look past what I think is real. To simply embody the Wonder… to hold the feeling throughout my being and when the trials of my life want to pull me down… to take a breath – smile – and allow the Wonder to pop through into my field. It becomes easier and easier.
I invite you to play. Pause several times a day to just sit or stand in the moment, and feel what is around you. Look for the enchantment that is in plain sight… a leaf on the sidewalk in the shape of a heart; a cloud that will certainly resemble anything you can make up; a color in the window of a shop that sets your imagination reeling; a baby’s smile when you pass the stroller and look into their eyes and grin – with your heart too; a story that shows up as you see a mini-scene unfold in front of you at the mall; making believe everyone you encounter is glowing from their own inner electricity.
We can all become expressions of Wonder.
The possibilities are limitless.
And there is never a shortage.
Marijane loves to fly kites, build fairie houses, blow bubbles – especially in crowds to pleasantly surprise people – eat organic dark chocolate, slide down rainbows, pick up pennies even if they’re not heads up… and dreams of one day living in a tree house. She believes that life is a Magical Mystery Tour…. and the journey is certainly enchanted if we believe it is so and we stay alert to the wonder. She loves being a joyful spark that helps people flip their creativity and lightness-of-being switches to “ON”, to help raise the vibration of the planet! She continues to improve her blog at magicalspark.wordpress.com.