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Category Archives: An Evolutionary Woman’s Journey Series

Polishing Your Inner GPS

Posted on November 2, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 33 of 100 days of blogging

It took me a long time to realize that I saw things other people didn’t see. The first time was when I was in a messy divorce and my husband was trying to prove I was crazy because I had started wearing crystal earrings and learning how to read Tarot Cards. I was leaving him and no longer wanted to live with an alcoholic. He tried to prove there was something wrong with me instead. That was in 1987 and luckily one of the psychiatrists who administered the tests told me that I wasn’t crazy, I just saw things that other people didn’t see. That my creativity and intuition was highly developed and on a psychological test it could appear I was crazy. She wouldn’t let me see the results in case my husband’s lawyer asked me about the test. She was really the first person who gave me permission and encouragement to be who I am and to explain something I hadn’t understand until then.

The biggest challenge after that was protecting that side of me so no one could hurt me (or burn me at the stake.) I found like minded people in Insight Seminars and I began to lead and teach in places like my living room and homeschooling my children in community based learning. I have spent my life questioning things that other people may assume is the only way and the right way to live life. Themes have been Living from Inspiration and Authentic Living and Listening to my Heart.

Recently, I arrived back in Baltimore after living on the road for a year, thinking I knew where I was going next. I had a clear vision of where I was going to live and I saw a variety of next steps. Then, everything started changing. Over and over. I felt like a ball in a pinball machine. At the same time, I also had a few things that anchored me. A few pet sitting jobs, a friend’s car, a few work projects. I wrote a blog called Using the Feelings of Failure as a Tool of Exploration. And that blog got a lot of comments. People who read it felt a resonance, an AHA! of “I have experienced this, too.”

My “go to” feeling is “I have failed.” You might feel, “I am not enough,” or feelings of depression, anxiety, or fear. What do you feel when something has ended and the next part of the path has not appeared. That is the clue.

In my last Immersion into the “I am a failure,” I knew that I had tools and resources and a resilience that would help me to discover and explore the next pathway. I went into the basement of the feelings and I came out with more words and ideas and an appreciation for a process that works. As I came back to the surface, I had people telling me that they were in a transition and two talks I did at conferences: “Using the Feelings of Failure as a Tool of Exploration” and “Tuning Into Deeper Listening,” were things they wanted to explore.

I am a Warrior Goddess who is intensely committed and has been focused on using every experience in my life to grow and learn. I am willing to go into the depths of a subject and topic and then bring out the gems to share with the world. An Extroverted Introvert I deeply listen and observe, feeling everything, learning, trying things I feel inspired to learn and experience. And when ready, I share it through writing and teaching.

So, I created a new program called, “Polishing Your Inner GPS: Carving the Next Step of Your Life.

If you are curious or your Inner GPS is dinging and flashing red neon signs, read on and see if now is the time for you. The secret FB group is open now. The optional in person workshops are in the DC area on Nov 5 or Nov 7. Everyone will receive all of the tools and resources and tons of support on the community phone calls and in the secret Facebook group.

Check it out here and sign up!

https://andreahylen.com/workshop-using-your-life-as-a-road-map/

No more coulda, shoulda, woulda!

*****

Andrea Hylen believes in the power of our voice to usher in a new world. She is the founder of Heal My Voice, an organization that inspires women and men to heal a story, reclaim personal power and step into greater leadership. Andrea discovered her unique gifts while parenting three daughters and learning to live life fully after the deaths of her brother, son and husband. In addition to serving as Heal My Voice’s Executive Director, Andrea is an Orgasmic Meditation Teacher and Sexuality Coach.

She is following her intuition as she collaborates with women and men in organizations and travels around the world speaking, teaching and leading workshops. Her passion is authentically living life and supporting others in doing the same. To connect with Andrea and learn about current projects go to: www.andreahylen.com and www.healmyvoice.org.

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series

Living in Flow: Clues and Initiation

Posted on October 29, 2015 by Webmaster Leave a comment

Day 29 of 100 days of blogging.

To read the first blog in this series of Living in Flow: Tuning In

On the train to Santa Barbara, I found myself taking a deep, deep breath and releasing a level of tension I didn’t realize I was carrying. I needed a time of recovery after the whirlwind of the year and packing a storage unit and 2 suitcases for the road.

I hung out with my friend Lucky Sweeny, the co-founder of Evolutionary Women, an astrologer and a coach. I spent time meditating, processing, sleeping, getting an updated astrology report on my year and a Pleiadian reading from Lucky.

It was here that I received my first clue of what the year would hold. During the next year, at each location there would be an initiation that would come in the form of an experience, a blessing, or a spotlight on one of my talents and skills and wisdom. A song, words from a person, a memory. The clues would remind me of who I am and point me in the next direction.

The connection to my intuition gave me a sense of knowing what was next. None of this was based on my logical, linear mind. It was a feeling and it required trust. All I needed to do was keep my eyes and ears open and feel it when it arrived.

Initiation:

The definition of Initiation: the act of starting something : the beginning of something; the condition of being initiated into some experience or sphere of activity.

Santa Barbara: Altar Initiation

There was an altar with powerful, spiritual women. I slept on the futon in the living room with the altar pointed towards the top of my head. My crown chakra. The first night, I was sound asleep and I heard a loud clap that sent a sharp, shaking tremor through my body from head to toe. Just one clap and then silence. I fell right back to sleep. In the morning, Lucky told me I had received a blessing called: Shakti Pat from Gurumayi.

Santa Cruz: A younger woman’s words

After spending a week with my friend Tomas, helping him with social media platforms; Eating great food from the Farmer’s Market, OMing every day in morning circle, receiving a full body massage and resting, I packed my bags and headed to one more OM circle.

Initiation: A young woman said, “Next time you are in town, I want to sit at your feet and listen. You are carving a path for the next part of my life. I am learning from you.”

Flew to Baltimore.

Baltimore: A man’s words and gratitude

Initiation: Orgasmic Meditation training and coaching

His words: “You have opened a doorway to connect to a deeper part of myself”

Bus to New York

New York: A younger woman’s words.

Initiation: “I am grateful for your existence in the world. You are an amazing person. We have so much to learn from you”

Plane to Sweden

Sweden: A younger woman’s words

Initiation: “Look around the room. See all the women who are part of this community. Thank you for starting the Heal My Voice projects. Look at the impact you are having around the world.”

Initiation of Mastery and doors opening that were pointing me to the next steps in my life. In New York, San Francisco, Baltimore, Washington, DC. San Francisco, Half Moon Bay, and Los Angeles. Clues and desires awakening in me. On puzzle piece at a time.

According to the Genome Flow Project, this is one of the cycles of Flow. The area of struggle. I was traveling, working, listening, asking questions and one piece at a time was appearing. This organization I had started in 2011 called Heal My Voice was impacting women and families and communities and businesses around the world. I was being called into owning my wisdom and experience and encouraged to become more visible in the world. To share what I have learned and to claim areas of Mastery.

When I arrived in Sweden, I was questioning if I would continue with Heal My Voice. Was I complete? And then the passion from the women in Heal My Voice Sweden and the dedication of Marie Ek Lipanovska, founder of Heal My Voice Sweden were all encouraging me to continue. I said yes to continue and to co-lead the next book program with Marie. To create a bridge between our countries. We began in October 2014. When I arrived back in the United States, I discovered that Heal My Voice had received tax exempt status. Time to move forward and look for the next clues.

One question was how my training and experience with Orgasmic Meditation was going to evolve or fizzle. I taught 35 people how to OM during that year. But how to integrate all of these different pieces. All I could do was stay open to the question and to wait.

**********

Sensual Voices: True Stories by Women Exploring Connection and Desire. was the project and it was published in June 2015.

**********

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Andrea Hylen, Living in Flow

Warrior Women: Tuning in for Deeper Listening

Posted on October 27, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 27 of 100 days of blogging

At the Warrior Women Empowerment and Wellness Retreat this past weekend in Pennsylvania, I led a workshop called Tuning into Deeper Listening.

http://warrior-women.net/

Here are a few of the key points from my talk:

*You were born with all of the answers you will ever need inside of you. They are encoded in the cells of your body. Throughout your life, you have experiences that wake up the cells that hold the desire and the information. We live our lives one moment, one hour, one day, one month, one year at a time. When it is time, you will receive the answers and know what to do and be next.

*We gather in groups, read books, listen to speakers, go to conferences and retreats and hire coaches so that we see, hear and feel things that wake up the cells and prepare us for the answers.

*We need the connection with each other to wake up.

*Deeper listening requires a process of emptying out and filling up. An example of how to do that is to take a walk. The first part of the walk you let go of all of the voices, the shoulds, the “to-do’s on your list”. Walk and release. Walk and empty. Let it all go. During the second part of the walk, you fill up. You breathe in the energy from your surroundings; the leaves that are changing on the trees, the sound of birds or in a city, the sounds of the subway, the feel of the wind on your face. Listen, notice, breathe.

*Deeper listening guides you to the people, places and things to create and carve the new pathway.

*Everything is happening at the perfect time. Louise Hay’s book, “You Can Heal Your Life” was published when she was 58 years old and she started Hay House, Inc (also when she was 58 years old.) Every experience leads you on the pathway for each decade. In your 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s, 70’s, 80’s 90’s, 100’s and beyond…

**********

A few of the tools I suggested to turn off your brain and access deeper listening:

Tool #1: Coloring books. (Hurrah! They are in style again! So many coloring books to choose from for your pleasure)

This is a perfect activity for a doer, type person. You are “doing” something while turning off your brain. Notice the colors you are drawn to and breathe in the colors.

A few coloring books I love!

1. Coloring Feeds the Soul and Keep Calm and Color

Pati Woodard: https://www.etsy.com/shop/patimakescoolstuff

2. The Big Girls Little Coloring Book

It has 21 Mandalas, each with an Affirmation and medARTation page.

The book is a journey through insights that are about topics like the power of the Mind, the role of Nature for healing and empowerment, how to identify Patterns in out life and many more.

http://www.amazon.com/Big-Girls-Little…/dp/1582706212

3. Coloring My Days by Kristen Webster

http://www.amazon.com/Coloring-My-Days-Kristen-Webster/dp/0996757430/

4. The Mindful Journey: Color~Create~Journal by Zan Packard

http://www.amazon.com/Mindful-Journey-Color-Create-Journal/dp/1470077450/

**********

Tool #2: Oracle Cards or Spirit Cards.

Doreen Virtue has created some of my favorites. Search on-line for a deck that resonates with you.

Randomly pick a card and focus on the photo, the words, the colors. Close your eyes and sit in silence for a few minutes. Let it stir something inside of you. Let go of your thoughts and feel.

**********

Tool #3: Get a small notebook and write down 5-10 clues and signs that cross your path every day. The things that light you up or bring curiosity and excitement. Some ideas:

1. Books

2. Words

3. A conversation

4. A phone call or Facebook message from an old friend

5. Colors, nature, music

6. A dream

Then, in a few weeks, go back and look at the trends. What topic repeats over and over? What do you feel and notice? Listen for the inspired action.

What helps you to go into deeper listening? Share with us in the comments section.

**********

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Living in Flow

A Desire to Be Visible: Women (and men!)

Posted on October 20, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 20 of 100 days of blogging

When I watched an episode of Grace and Frankie this summer, I laughed at this scene hysterically until it struck a chord in my heart.

Grace (Jane Fonda) and Frankie (Lily Tomlin) are in a personal crisis and they decide to go to the store to buy a pack of cigarettes.

Frankie: Stand back. I’m about to lose my shit. Can we get some cigarettes over here for cryin’ out loud?

The man moves towards Grace and then ignores her to help a young, beautiful, blond woman.

Grace (to the store clerk, a man):

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Are you in a coma?

You, sir. Hello, hello.

(hysterical) HELLOOOOOOO (pounding on the counter)

What kind of animal treats people like this?

Do you not see me? Do I not exist? Do you think it’s alright to ignore us just because she has gray hair? And I don’t look like HER? (pointing at the young blond)

Frankie takes Grace by the arm and leads her out of the store.

Later in the car:

Grace: Okay. That lacked poise and I’m sorry. But, I refuse to be irrelevant.

At any age, what do we want as women? We want to be seen. We want your attention. We have something to say. We want to be respected and listened to. We want to be valued for our wisdom and courage. We want to be relevant and to know that we matter.

And at a social event, last week. I heard a young man in his 20’s saying the same thing. For the first time. His tender, vulnerable heart exposed. A man who felt that people don’t see him and don’t take the time to really listen. He wants to be relevant, too.

Maybe it’s time for all of us to slow down and listen. Start with yourself. Listen to yourself. Your ideas. Your needs. Your wants. Your desires. Give to yourself.

Then, turn your attention out. To others.

Be the change…

Here is the clip:

*****

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Andrea Hylen

An Old Story: Negative Self-Talk and People Pleasing

Posted on October 19, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 19 of 100 days of blogging

(Blogpost Originally Published when Andrea was a Guest Blogger on Alpha Chick on January 22, 2013)

Andrea Hylen: Her Story of Transformation

http://www.malduanecoach.com/guest-andrea-hylen/

We all experience life challenges that looking back we can see were the catalyst for living a deeper, more authentic life. What has been your greatest personal challenge that you’ve overcome that served as your pivot point to transformation?

Negative Self-Talk and People Pleasing.

The greatest challenge, the one that took every ounce of strength I had was making the decision to leave my first marriage. And the main reason it was so hard was my dysfunctional pattern of people-pleasing and putting everyone’s needs and desires ahead of my own. In my family, everyone was married for 50+ years. Marriage was honored and valued as a lifetime commitment. ‘Til death do us part. I felt there was an unspoken pact within the family. The words loyalty, fear and shame were attached to the big “D” word. You got married and you dealt with the dysfunction. If you were unhappy, just put yourself at the bottom of the list and deal with it. Even with a family lineage of alcoholism and verbal abuse and unhealthy relationships, divorce was never an option.

So, when I told a family member that my marriage was falling apart and I felt my heart was breaking, I was told, “you made your bed now lie in it.” No discussion. No questions asked. No concern over the words “I am dying inside.” It was expected that marriage was a lifelong sentence. No reason for early parole. You made your bed, now lie in it. I met my husband at Temple University on the day before school. Both of us were transfer students and there was an optional “studying seminar” we both attended to start the semester on a strong foundation. Our lives were woven together in the first few weeks of school when we discovered that we both commuted an hour and a half to school and lived only 10 minutes from each other. Synchronistic connection. One day we found ourselves standing on the train platform together! Totally surprised. I became a member of his family instantly and we were married after four years of school, work and dating.

He was a functional alcoholic. Working a full time job with overtime, then coming home, cracking open a beer and drinking all night until he fell into bed. I was aware of the alcoholism in his family and in one conversation before we were married, he told me he would stop drinking. A sign of my people-pleasing. Do not confront anything that might be a conflict. Do not bring up uncomfortable conversations. We moved two hours from our families, bought a house, worked full time jobs and gave birth to two daughters. The birth of our second child, Elizabeth threw me into a tailspin. In the hospital, I remember looking into her eyes and feeling this powerful wake-up call. It was like she was saying, “Okay, Mom. I am here now. Get it together.” Six weeks after her birth, I returned to work and saw a flyer in the elevator, announcing a lunchtime Al-Anon meeting. No more excuses. It was time to tell people that I was living with an alcoholic and to admit how exhausted I was from trying to make our marriage work. I felt like a failure.

The people pleaser in me had converted to Catholicism, walked on eggshells, suffered in silence, tried: cleaning the house, being cheerful, cooking Sunday night dinners, doing all of the child care, grocery shopping and more. My husband was critical and controlling and my own negative, internal self-talk had an ongoing conversation of criticism layered on top of his. Finally, I started to see a therapist and explore the family history of alcoholism and the dysfunctional behavior in my household.

By the time I hit an emotional bottom, I was isolated from family and friends, forgot who I was and what I valued, lost all sense of self, sleep deprived and suffering from a mild depression.

Describe the transformational moment or wake-up call when you realized that life change was necessary? For many, it’s a spiritual awakening, an emotional downfall, or a life-altering experience that shakes us awake.

There were two pivotal moments that were wake-up calls. The first was late one night, sitting in the kitchen cross stitching ornaments for Christmas presents. Surviving on only three to four hours of sleep each night, I had a moment of paralysis. My legs and feet were frozen in place. I couldn’t move. I cried out for my husband to help me. With his assistance, I was slowly able to shuffle into the bedroom. Crying myself to sleep that night, I kept repeating inwardly to myself, tomorrow is Al-Anon. I just have to make it to the Al-Anon meeting. Pushing myself to be the perfect mother, wife, employee, including making handmade ornaments had driven me to the beginning of a nervous breakdown. The second was seeing a look in my two year old daughters eyes, the daughter who was calling me to “get it together.” I was arguing with her father when I heard a voice in my head say, “This is not the role model I came to be for my children.” I made the decision that I would leave the marriage for the sake of my daughters.

After experiencing your personal wake-up call what were the most powerful steps you took to change your life?

It took me almost a year and finally I moved out of the house. Emotionally it felt like I was crawling away. To get out, I left my daughters behind. No support from family or friends, my husband and I verbally agreed to joint custody. I knew I needed to take the oxygen mask for myself first. To rent a house, set up the household and then resume my role as a mother. My husband manipulated the legal system and tried to prove that I was crazy. He denied our verbal agreement and told everyone I left the children. The first few years, we were in the court systems fighting for joint custody. I learned how to use my voice to stand up for myself and my children. I took energy classes and learned a variety of healing modalities. Attended Insight Seminars that helped me to connect with a new community of conscious, awakening people. Organized book circles in my living room to heal emotionally with John Bradshaw’s: The Family, Julia Cameron’s: The Artist’s Way and James Redfield’s: The Celestine Prophecy. Over time the commitment I made to my own healing, helped to heal my daughters, too.

Please share a Positive Mental Shift tip that woman can implement today to support them on their journey of transformation and empowerment.

FIND SUPPORT from healthy individuals and groups.The funny thing about support is that the biggest thing most of us really need is inspiration and someone who believes in us. Someone who can mirror who we really are and remind us that each day we are getting stronger and healthier. I found support in Al-Anon and in groups of people in spiritual classes and workshops. I had amazing mentors at work and slowly but surely, I found my tribe of people. Now, 25 years later, I see Facebook groups and Pages another wonderful support of inspiration.

One more thing: I know that we haven’t met in person. But, I know that if you are reading this, you are ready to wake up. And I BELIEVE in YOU!!

*****

Andrea Hylen at Agape in Los Angeles

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Andrea Hylen, Transformation, Transitions

Music Inspiration Oct 18, 2015

Posted on October 18, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 18 of 100 days of blogging

Music Inspires me and it is a clue to my inner world. The songs I want to play over and over. I feel the music in my body and soul and it leads me to transform with the energy in the song. The songs are playing in my mind and pulsing through my body. I take a walk every day and feel the new me that is emerging.

My theme songs this week are:

I’m a Grown Woman by Beyonce

Confident by Demi Lovato

*****

I made a few decisions in the last few weeks to follow more of my life desires in work and my personal life. It started on my 59th Birthday. I took the day for myself in New York City instead of spending it with my daughter and granddaughter. I was there for a week with them and I wanted the day for me. To explore. To connect with adults. New and old friends. I feel this incredible freedom to be me and to embrace my grown woman self. To do what I want to because I can!

*****

Beyonce singing, “I’m a grown woman, I can do whatever I want,”

After spending three days posting in The New Masculine Community on Facebook, I feel an incredible power pulsing through me. My voice is so grounded and clear and powerful. My Power. Not power over the men and women in the group. Power to listen, feel and speak. My Voice. And then I heard this song.

What song is giving you a clue about your life right now? A music inspiration!

Post in the comments and tell us why.

******

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Andrea Hylen, Music Inspiration

Building Community: Learning from the Masculine and Feminine

Posted on October 17, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 17 of 100 days of blogging

A few weeks ago, a female friend invited me to a group called The New Masculine Community. When I first saw the words, I wondered why she was inviting me to a men’s group. I am a woman and I work mainly with women in my organization, Heal My Voice.

The description in the group:

This group is for education, discussion and debate. It originally was formed to support a men’s program by Zat Baraka, Ken Blackman and Robert Kandell called the Razor’s Edge that was run in Winter 2015.

Please note:
Masculine does not necessarily mean man.
Feminine does not necessarily mean woman.

This page is for ALL genders and ALL sexual orientations to discuss the topics of masculine and feminine nature in today’s ever-changing world. To help breakdown the bullshit conventions that run us, which haven’t worked in a very long time.

We are a community of people who want to learn more about how we tick and how others. We are here to share ideas and concepts. You might not like everything that you read. However, we hope that it influences you enough to notice your programming.

Having spent the last three years in what appears to be a female-centric practice (Orgasmic Meditation) and being committed to living in community and practicing with men, I decided to hang out in the group and read some of the comments. (I also really admire and appreciate the work of Ken Blackman and Robert Kandell who originally started the group and I know there is a team of women and men monitoring the posts.)

This week, one of the women in the group posted an article about Bradley Cooper (an actor) supporting Jennifer Lawrence (an actress) in her article about the Hollywood Pay Gap. Cooper has been teaming up with female stars to negotiate salaries before film production starts. “I don’t know where it’s changing otherwise but that’s something that I could do,” Cooper said.

http://nytlive.nytimes.com/womenintheworld/2015/10/15/bradley-cooper-is-on-board-with-jennifer-lawrences-takedown-of-the-hollywood-pay-gap/

I feel like that is the point. If we see something in the world that is wrong, we can do our part. Do something. Support someone. Teach a woman or man how to negotiate a salary. Look around and see where you can offer your unique talents and skills. It begins with each of us making that choice individually.

I made a choice in my life 30 years ago to live in community where every person is supported and encouraged to be the fullest expression of who they really are. (By community, I mean finding like minded people who wanted to do the same thing. We all lived in our own family homes all over the city)

We were all committed to heal the wounds of what we were taught are the roles of feminine and masculine. I made a choice to look at my own actions and behavior first, decide where I needed changes. I left a marriage because in that verbal and sexual abusive environment, I was not being the role model I came to be for my two little girls. I made the choice to leave and start unraveling generations of patterning about submissive women.

When I first read the article, I wrote the first comment and highlighted words Cooper spoke about seeing a problem and doing his part to make it right. He isn’t trying to change the whole world by himself, just making a change where he had power. I invite you to let go of the amount of money they are making. That is a distraction from the bigger picture. This is an example of “In my world, I can change this.”

After the death of our son and my own life threatening illness my 2nd husband and I decided to homeschool our children to provide an environment where they had more self-expression and freedom to be themselves. We connected with 1000 families in the Baltimore~DC area. Pooled resources, offered our unique talents and skills, daily interaction and field trips. Stroked out the best of each kid. Male or female. Gave them the freedom to find out who they are. Then, it was up to each child to make their own choices. We laid the foundation.

Instead of talking about a bunch of theory about what is the new masculine and what is feminine leadership, how about each of us taking a look at where we can support someone to be the best they can be instead of using humor or criticism to diminish them. Ask yourself, how can I be the best version of a man? How can I be the best version of a woman? How can I integrate masculine and feminine characteristics of creativity, intuition, action, strength into my life? Feel. Think. Open your eyes and look around.

The commitment to your own growth doesn’t end until you die. I imagine that every person reading this blogpost has a desire, a longing for better communication with others and deep down wants to peel away the facade of who you thought you were supposed to be. And underneath, there is another part of you that wants to be seen and felt and heard.

You don’t have to do everything. Do something. Do your part.

We are all in this together.

*****

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Andrea Hylen

Living in Flow: What is Flow?

Posted on October 16, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 16 of 100 days of blogging

Taking a pause today to add some definition to the word Flow.

Studies have shown that flow is one stage in a Flow Cycle. Steven Kotler is a researcher and author who has given us some words for what happens in the flow cycle and how to do things to jumpstart and trigger the flow step.

Flow Cycle: (You have to return through all 4 parts of the cycle before returning to flow.)

Struggle: Loading with new information.

Release or Relaxtion: Take your mind off the problem.

Flow: You are in the flow state (In the zone)

Recovery: Go into a low feeling.

The power in the cycle is to learn how to move through struggle and recover better.

There are 17 triggers or preconditions that bring on more flow.

Psychological Triggers:

Intensely Focused Attention

Clear Goals

Immediate Feedback

The Challenge/Skills Ratio

Environmental Triggers:

High Consequences

Rich Environment

Deep Embodiment

Social Triggers:

Serious Concentration

Shared, Clear Goals

Good Communication

Familiarity

Equal Participation and Skill Level

Risk

Sense of Control

Close Listening

Always Say Yes

Creative Trigger

Creativity (Pattern Recognition and Risk Taking

For more information go to the Flow Genome Project

http://www.flowgenomeproject.co/

*****

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Living in Flow

Living in Flow: Tuning In

Posted on October 15, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 15 of 100 days of Blogging

Los Angeles. March 2014.

I had been living in a community house for 10 months. Everything about it was fantastic! I loved the people, the activities, community living, sharing a huge kitchen, and my bedroom in the garage apartment. I wanted to live there forever.

One day I was clearing things out of one of the bathrooms; old toiletries in a bathroom cabinet I rarely used. As soon as my hand touched the facial cleanser, I felt a ripple of energy go through my body and I heard the words, “It’s time to move.” The feeling and the words were subtle, barely a whisper and yet, I was familiar with the way my Higher Self communicated with me. I stopped and asked the question, “Am I moving? Are we all moving together?” No answer.

An hour later, I was in my bedroom going through some papers when I had the same sensation. A ripple of energy running from my hand, down my arm and through my body. I heard another whisper, “It’s time to move.”

I asked questions in meditation several times over the next week. When I didn’t receive any other “signs” or “messages”, I decided to take some action by going through my 10 x 10 storage unit and everything in my apartment space.

Over the next six weeks, I lived my life and in between daily work and play, I reviewed every piece of paper and every thing I owned. At the end of the six weeks, I gave away 14 boxes of personal belongings and 6 bags of clothes.

By the middle of April, the next piece of information arrived. The owner of the house was selling the house and we would all have to move when the lease expired at the beginning of June. There were numerous conversations as a household and with individuals who felt aligned for the next living space. The ten of us finally dispersed to move into three different places in Los Angeles, two people moved to New York while my intuition directed me to live on the road for a year and stay with Heal My Voice Authors and Board Members. To have conversations, to live life, to finish incomplete projects and to collect ideas, wisdom, for the next step.

When I announced my intention to friends and family the response came back with words like gypsy and free spirit. There was excitement, envy, and fear in their eyes. What was I doing now? To some it looked like I was a wanderlust who was lost in another adventure with no goals, no purpose. It couldn’t be farther from the truth. I was living in flow as a daily practice to expand my business and to discover the next steps. I was open to where I would be led to learn and discover new things about myself and about the world. I needed time to integrate all of the changes over the last nine years and to be ready for the next steps. At each location, I challenged myself to step out of my comfort zone, to be in the present moment, to listen and learn and speak when inspired.

People asked questions and they wanted answers. Where are you going? How long will you be there? What are you going to do? At first I had no idea. I was listening and waiting. One day, I thought about my friend Lucky Sweeny and the possibility of staying with her for 5 days in Santa Barbara. I knew I had a class in San Francisco in a few weeks and wanted to stay on the West Coast for that. A few hours later, Lucky called me spontaneously and I asked if I could stay with her June 1-5. She said yes and how perfect the timing was. The rest of the month she would be busy or out of town.

During the next week, I began to have feelings and a sense of inner knowing about the general location.

June: Santa Barbara, Santa Cruz, San Franciscoo

July: East Coast

August: Sweden

September: East Coast

October-December: West Coast

I made a few calls. Stated my feelings and desire. Received invitations with open arms and enthusiasm and packed my bags.

On June 1, 2014 I stood outside of my community house at 6am, taking a moment of gratitude and then climbed into my daughter’s car for a ride to the train station in Burbank. And so began a year of living in flow on the road…

*****

Posted in adventure, An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series

Orgasmic Meditation: My 28th OM

Posted on October 14, 2015 by Andrea Hylen Leave a comment

Day 14 of 100 days of blogging

In 2014, I co-facilitated a group of women from Sweden and the United States to write a story in the book Sensual Voices: True Stories by Women Exploring Connection and Desire. Women wrote stories from the body about childbirth, puberty, menopause, and sexuality. My story was called: Slut: A woman with the morals of a man. (This is the definition from the Urban Dictionary) I processed a lot of feelings and emotions to write this story. A journey of sexual exploration. It was a bigger “coming out” to family, friends, community with a topic that is hidden for most of us. When I released my story into the book, I felt free.

This is an excerpt from my story where I wrote about an experience in an OM (Orgasmic Meditation:

Inside of me were these different parts that seemed incongruent, the mother, the slut, the nice girl, the bitch, the soft feminine, the determined warrior. Most of the time, I felt I had to shut down the desires of the slut. I rarely let her take charge and claim her lusty, natural desires.

At the age of 56, I entered a world of sexual exploration consciously and took one step at a time; pausing, trying something new, reflecting, checking in to see how it felt in my body and willing to experience everything. I decided to become a living research project. Over a two-year period, I practiced Orgasmic Meditation (OM) with multiple partners, had an intimacy research partner to explore sex and vulnerable conversation, lived in a conscious community with a morning OM practice, and took a year of coursework in a Desire-based Leadership Program and Orgasm Mastery. I kept a journal to record my experiences and feelings.

OM #28: A moment in an OM

Have you ever had a man place his full attention on your body?

Me, quietly: “I feel sad,”
Him calmly: “I’ve got you. Let it out.”

Laying on my back, legs spread in a butterfly position, his finger lightly stroked my clitoris in this 15 minute partnered practice. This time I released sadness. His attention and my surrender allowed wave after wave of sobbing outbursts to erupt from the cells of my body and through my voice. After the first five minutes, I could feel the sobs welling up again like a wave in the ocean building to a crescendo. I shout out to him:

“DON’T LEAVE ME””

Him: “I’m right here. I won’t leave.”

In this, my 28th OM, I am releasing so much emotion, I cannot believe a man will stay connected, will keep lightly stroking, will hold a space calmly while I get to feel and release everything!

I was raised with the idea that men were incapable of holding my emotion. I had to tone it down. Be a nice girl. Cry silently. Alone. The idea that a man could place all of his attention on me without asking me to immediately turn and place my attention on him is amazing.

After the OM, he asked if I was okay. Did I need anything? Water? Food? Bathroom? Another OM? Yes to water and bathroom and OM. Get back into the OM nest of blankets and pillows and integrate what just happened.

I lay down in the nest again; legs butterflied open. Trusting him even more. Going into deeper surrender. Throughout the OM, the only thing that emerges is connection, heightened sensation and more pleasure than I have ever felt in my life. I am cracked open.

The experience changed us both. I felt a man place his full attention on me. Holding all of me. And going into the deepest surrender I have ever felt. He experienced a woman trusting him enough to let him hold her, all of her. Maybe the things we were taught about women and men while growing up are not true. We both saw a glimpse of what is possible with greater connection, trust, surrender and support.

He later described me as one of the chambers of his heart. For breaking his heart out of his prison and putting it back together. This was a moment in time that cracked both of us open to be more of who we are in our separate lives. I am grateful that our paths crossed with so much intimacy and healing.

I am grateful for the practice of OM and for the people who have the courage to try it.

*****

Andrea Hylen believes in the power of our voice to usher in a new world. She is the founder of Heal My Voice, an organization that inspires women and men to heal a story, reclaim personal power and step into greater leadership. Andrea discovered her unique gifts while parenting three daughters and learning to live life fully after the deaths of her brother, son and husband. In addition to serving as Heal My Voice’s Executive Director, Andrea is an Orgasmic Meditation Teacher and Sexuality Coach.

Posted in An Evolutionary Woman's Journey Series, Orgasmic Meditation

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