A Desire to Be Visible: Women (and men!)
Day 20 of 100 days of blogging
When I watched an episode of Grace and Frankie this summer, I laughed at this scene hysterically until it struck a chord in my heart.
Grace (Jane Fonda) and Frankie (Lily Tomlin) are in a personal crisis and they decide to go to the store to buy a pack of cigarettes.
Frankie: Stand back. I’m about to lose my shit. Can we get some cigarettes over here for cryin’ out loud?
The man moves towards Grace and then ignores her to help a young, beautiful, blond woman.
Grace (to the store clerk, a man):
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Are you in a coma?
You, sir. Hello, hello.
(hysterical) HELLOOOOOOO (pounding on the counter)
What kind of animal treats people like this?
Do you not see me? Do I not exist? Do you think it’s alright to ignore us just because she has gray hair? And I don’t look like HER? (pointing at the young blond)
Frankie takes Grace by the arm and leads her out of the store.
Later in the car:
Grace: Okay. That lacked poise and I’m sorry. But, I refuse to be irrelevant.
At any age, what do we want as women? We want to be seen. We want your attention. We have something to say. We want to be respected and listened to. We want to be valued for our wisdom and courage. We want to be relevant and to know that we matter.
And at a social event, last week. I heard a young man in his 20’s saying the same thing. For the first time. His tender, vulnerable heart exposed. A man who felt that people don’t see him and don’t take the time to really listen. He wants to be relevant, too.
Maybe it’s time for all of us to slow down and listen. Start with yourself. Listen to yourself. Your ideas. Your needs. Your wants. Your desires. Give to yourself.
Then, turn your attention out. To others.
Be the change…
Here is the clip:
Andrea Hylen believes in the power of our voice to usher in a new world. She is the founder of Heal My Voice, an organization that inspires women and men to heal a story, reclaim personal power and step into greater leadership. Andrea discovered her unique gifts while parenting three daughters and learning to live life fully after the deaths of her brother, son and husband. In addition to serving as Heal My Voice’s Executive Director, Andrea is an Orgasmic Meditation Teacher and Sexuality Coach.
She is following her intuition as she collaborates with women and men in organizations and travels around the world speaking, teaching and leading workshops. Her passion is authentically living life and supporting others in doing the same. To connect with Andrea and learn about current projects go to: www.andreahylen.com and www.healmyvoice.org.